Monique and Monica: The Names I Chose


For those who don’t know, my full name is a long one. I’m Filipino. Long names come with the territory. My first name is Ann Mary, but I go by my middle name “Monique.” This often leads to people calling me “Monica” by mistake. Whenever that happened, I wouldn’t mind. After all, I chose Monica as my Confirmation name. Now unlike my brother and other high school kids, I didn’t choose my Confirmation name after researching the saints. In spite of the fact that I went to Catholic School, I didn’t really get to know the saints outside of information cards and the childish renditions in those books where the saints looked like movie stars. You know the ones. I chose Monica as my Confirmation name out of convenience, not really putting a lot of thought into it.

And yet I still care about what people call me. I don’t mind being mistakenly called Monica, but “Ann Mary” or “Mary Ann” as some may mistakenly say never sounded right to me. I also didn’t like being called “Momo” by some bullies back in high school nor did I like it when someone thought a different name would be better for me than the one I already had.

The name “Monica” means “advisor” and the story of St. Monica shows her trying to advise her son, Saint Augustine, but ultimately she surrendered herself and her son to God in the hopes that Augustine would reform. And reform he did. In my personal life, I do give advice to my friends who ask and I offer to help my friends out with their problems. I also tend to have an “advice column” kind of voice when I write my Bible studies and sometimes on this blog as well.

I don’t ask for St. Monica’s intercession as often as I should, but I feel like the saint whose name I share is still a part of me. Like Monica, I am devoted to my faith and long for the return of my fallen brothers and sisters in Christ. I’m also learning that when you share your faith openly, you will be met with some hostility, but for the most part, people don’t mind as long as it comes from a personal level and not like the Westboro Baptist Church.

I hope that I grow to have Saint Monica’s perseverance and undying trust in God as I get older. And the next time someone calls me “Monica,” I will still correct them, but still feel happy that my name is linked with a woman like her.

What's In A Name?

Today is Pope Francis’s birthday. And something people forget about birthdays is that it’s not only the day you were born, but more often than not the day when you are given a name.

I have been known by many names in my life. I was born Ann Mary Monique Sandil Ocampo. Later on, I insisted on being called by my middle name so I wouldn’t be addressed as “Mary Ann.” In high school, I was called “Mi-chan” by my best friend, “Lady” by my guy friends, and “DJ Dizzy” whenever I was on the morning announcements.  But I also dealt with my fair share of name calling. A high school bully called me “Momo” and “Snaggletooth.” One classmate in college flirted with me a lot and called me “babe” or “baby” at least once. An absent minded professor kept calling me “Michelle.” Someone who I thought was friend wanted me to change my name altogether so that I could start a new life with them.

But now that I’m out of college, I am back to being regular Monique Ocampo. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Why is the name we call ourselves by so important?

According to Aquinas, the name of a thing says something about the thing itself. It’s like how St. Peter the Apostle’s name meant “rock” as an analogy to Peter being the foundation of the church as well as to Peter’s headstrong personality. Names can be meaningful by the definition behind the name or they can honor a person by that same name.

When you change your name, you change a part of yourself. Some people change their names to take on a new identity, either to stand out or blend in or mark a significant change in their lives. Sometimes name changes are part of a coming of age ritual such as the sacrament of Confirmation where most young adults choose a Confirmation name or when religious sisters change their name as they take on their final vows.

So why do popes change their names? It started with Pope John II in 533, who originally had the name Mercurius. He felt it inappropriate for a pope to have the name of a Roman god. Nowadays, popes have changed their names to honor their predecessors, a family member, or a saint they have a strong devotion to. In the case of Pope Francis, he chose the name after a friend in the conclave told him to remember the poor when he takes on the papacy. And even though I’ve called popes by nicknames (JP2 and Papa B), I haven’t found the right nickname for Pope Francis. But maybe for now I don’t need one. For now, just calling him “Pope Francis” is enough.